Read Some Stewf

Dinner Conversation

The following dialogue courtesy my good cousin Suzanne, mother of three:

Her eight-year-old son (rubbing his hands together):

When I grow up, I’m going to make cartoons with lots of violence!!!

Her four-year-old daughter (with a romantic face):

Violets? I loooove violets!!!

Julkalender

My swedish pal Peter and his wife Lotta created an advent calendar featuring her children’s book characters and his photography. Let it load and click on the pics to biggify. Cute as heck.

Re-Wonka

Here cometh the new Charlie. I’m simultaneously thrilled and wary. No one can replace Gene Wilder, so I guess that’s why Depp is completely different: younger and green(?). The sets look beautiful, as is to be expected from Tim Burton, but I'm disappointed in the Golden Ticket...

Coliseum (incidentally the old Southwest Airlines font) works okay in its bold antique woodiness, but c’mon guys, there are only seven of these babies in existence — where's the ornamentation? Wonka logo’s nice, tho. I wonder what Mark’s take will be.

I suppose they didn’t use any of the magical Leslie Bricusse and Anthony Newley penned music, since it's all Elfmanned up. And where are the oompa loompas? I want to see an oompa loompa now! I want the world. I want the whole world. I want to lock it all up in my pocket, it’s my bar of chocolate! Give it to me now!

New Pets

I support cloning, stem cell research, genetic modification, animal testing, or whatever it takes to make it possible to own very small bears that fit in the palm of your hand. Thanks to Zara for the notion.

New Maps

Sent by friends and gathered from the web (click any image to biggify):

Facial Hair × 5

Dream #21: Advice for Frank

In which I’m watching a Sinatra movie. It pauses suddenly during a party scene and Frank begins talking to me, directly, from inside the TV screen. We chat for a bit and I warn him that though he’s able to throw caution to the wind in these early days of life, there will soon be a time when he’ll wake up with his first hangover, so he better drink lots of water tonight. I wake.

JimmyCam

The InterWeb is rad. One minute you’re just surfin’ around, checking some web cams, and then suddenly your brother pops in at Times Square to shop for postcards.

Oprah Medusa — The Ticket to Kerry Victory

Stewf: i am a political genius
Stewf: if kerry campaign could get oprah on board, wouldn’t he win?
Eric: heh, a segment, but it would be dangerous for Oprah to play that game
Eric: her market is across the board
Eric: and it might polarize her audience
Eric: and thus her advertisers
Eric: but don’t let that stop you from phone, emailing, and snail mailing her offices until your fingers bleed
Eric: her support would be amazing
Stewf: they will do whatever she says
Stewf: the oprah heads
Eric: I’d like to see an oprah medusa with little yes men snake heads snapping around her in a slithering flow
Eric: her eyes glow red, throwing up her hands, “Kerry will win!”

Know Your Stewf [TAKE 2]

There was a lot of whining over my last quiz. Apparently, (especially according to those who received low scores), it was either “rigged”, “faulty”, “Flash-based”, “inaccurate”, or just plain “lame”. So, in the interest of my dear friends, and not at all for my narcissism, I present How Well Do You Know Your Stewf? [TAKE 2]. Don’t be afraid to enter your email addy — it’s required to receive the answer sheet — just unclick the invitation to receive their spamity.